Sorry. I got into difficulty. Or rather, into prison. This slipshifting business is not as easy as you might think. The thing is, sometimes the Druids just send me off and I arrive wherever it is ina flash. Sometimes they tell me to "Hang on" and it`s more like flying. I can see where I`m going. Sometimes there`s a mistake and that`s how I landed in that horrible school in England where I nearly ended up being flogged.
As soon as I had learned English well enough, off I went to Rome, to find out what about Diarmid`s life as a captive there was like. The idea was that I would also learn Latin and find out about the Romans. It was necessary, if Iwas going to make a proper job of telling the story of Celts v Romans. They`re a funny lot, the Romans. Quite often they make it hard to see the joke. They can be very cruel. I`ll tell you all about it next time.
About a hundred years after Diarmid`s time and Julius Caesar`s invasions, the Romans came back. They had a lot more soldiers and this time they stayed. My job was to give messages to the Britons, about what the Romans were like. Mind you, by that time, the Britons knew quite well what they were like. The gauls had been defeated. I was just coming out of the steam bath when I heard the words "Hang on" and off I went.
You know how it is when you`re travelling. You see things. It`s just the same with slipshifting and I had just passed over the snows on the high Alps when I lost concentration. It was my own fault. But I ask you, if you see a really big pack of wolves you can`t help staring at them, can you? So the spell was broken and I fell in amongst them.
Luckily, they must have just eaten. They only sniffed at me and wandered off. First I panicked about the wolves, then I realised I had lost my slipshift. Not only that, I had passed into a time a long way on from wher I was supposed to be. It would take time to find me. The next thing I knew, I was hit from behind, a sack was put over my head, which smelled of pigs. I woke up just in time to notice I was being thrown in prison. I don`t mind the smell of pigs, but the prison was horrible. It had no latrine or toilet. Can you imagine?
The country was called Thuringia. They told me they thought I looked like someone who had upset the Thuringian King. It all took a long time to sort out. Peopple came and looked at and asked questions. For some reason they knew Latin. This was good, as I didn`t known their alnguage. I was kept alive because some Thuringians did not much like their King and wanted a change. From time to time I could hear fighting in the streets. So they wanted to keep me alive, at least until they found a judge who wanted to sentence me to death. The food was quite good, for a prison.
That`s how I made a friend. She was a rat and came in to see if there was any food on the go. She hobbled in from the far corner because she only had three legs, like a tripod. I took pity on her, gave her food called her Tripo. It was the first name she had ever had. One of the things about slipshifting is that you can talk to animals and even plants. You have to sit very still and it takes a long time to hear plants. Trees are a bit quicker. With animals, it `s just like people. Almost.
Tripo told me all about the prison, where she had been born and how she lost her paw. She explained about the torture chamber, which was full of horrid instruments, including The Iron Maiden, which was a coffin with long spikes on the inside.
Day followed day, Winter followed Summer, until one day inearly Spring, I asked Tripo about the guards.
"Oh," said, "some of them aren`t too bad."
"They seem pretty horrible."
"That`s because they`re guarding you and not me," said Tripo, "I suppose you must fear they`ll put you to sleep."
I jumped.
"P-p-put me to sleep?" I stuttered.
"Only if they want totake someone somewhere and they think he`ll fight. You`ve made them firghtened."
"Frightened? Why?"
"Because you look like a warrior. And they can`t work out where you come from. Your people might send an army for you. Must go. Byeee!"
When Tripo ran run off, I thought I must have frightened her myself. I should have known her better. The next day she squeezed in under the door, dragging a thimble.
"Look!" she announced proudly.
It must have been a great task for her. The thimble would have fitted on the stubby finger of a jailer, so it was a great load for her. Also, it was made heavier by being full of white powder.
"What`s this?" I asked in amazement, picking it up.
"No," she cried, "Don`t touch! It`s sleeping powder. I know where they keep it."
With that she ran up the door and started gnawing the place where the hinges were. Without pausing to explain, she ran out again. She returned carrying a long nail, about two hand`s breadths.
"Now listen and tell me if I`ve got it wrong," she said, "I think I know how we can both get out of here."
I lay on my bed and dear Tripo started whispering in my ear.
More soon
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